Visions of Faulty Elevator Logic

Elevator buttons
Elevator buttons

My Grandma Rotanelli was a smart woman. Three academic degrees, an acclaimed teaching career, mind as sharp as a tack. But for the life of her, she couldn’t figure out how to operate a simple elevator.

Specifically, those UP and DOWN buttons always threw her for a loop.

What seemed blatantly obvious to me (and the vast majority of the developed world) just didn’t synch with the way Grandma’s mind worked.

If she was on the ground floor of a building, for example, and wanted to take the elevator up to the third floor, she insisted on pushing the DOWN button.

Why? Because – as she repeatedly explained – the elevator had to travel DOWN to pick her up.  To her, that logic made perfect sense…summon the elevator DOWN before signaling her intention to go UP.

She was awfully stubborn, that one.

I must admit to feeling a special kinship with Grandma as I attempted to learn simple HTML commands to customize my new business website. Let’s just say HTML logic and my logic don’t exactly jive. And, much to my displeasure, mine was the only logic that was willing to budge.

Looks like there’s a new senior citizen who can’t adapt to modern technology in town... (Stop laughing, Grandma. You would’ve kicked the computer across the room long ago…)

I’m grateful to the patient folks at Mojo Themes – and theme-dynamo Branko – for helping me to throw together a minimalistic site while only having to be talked off a cliff a few times. Although some additional documentation would’ve been helpful to this clueless customer, my character is undoubtedly stronger from having to sweat it out the old-fashioned way.

Who knows: someday, I may even learn to code with the confidence and grace I exude every time I sashay up to an elevator.

But given my heritage, I wouldn't count on it.